School is Almost Out

Just wanted to post how Emma and David are doing.

Emma LOVES her class and she likes school. She asked me the other day if she could go back to Montessori next year. I said yes and she gave me a big hug.

David, it has been such a blessing to put him in Montessori. He has a great teacher, she truly cares about the kids and their future. The post before this I wrote that David may be dyslexic, he will be tested next year if the teacher continues to notice any issues. I was just told about a book called The Brain Gym. The friend that told me about this book said that when her husband was a kids he was diagnosed with dyslexia and the mother studied the book and the exercises that were taught and had her son do the exercises and it cured him. This book is also great for kids with ADD and ADHD and well for anyone, it helps with memorization and better learning. My husband just ordered it for me, I am excited to read it and help David and my 3 year old Jacob, he's got lots of energy.

David also had his ears tested and he failed both ears. So, I took him the the school's audiologist and had him tested again. They said that the problem goes all the way to the back of the ear. He has problems hearing high pitched sounds. Like women's voices. When a women is speaking to him he needs background noises quieted and they even said that it would be better if he is looking at the person when she talks. Very interesting. They said that there is nothing we can do about it at this time, just watch. They also said that he will fail his test at school every year and he will need to be taken to the audiologist.

They are both very excited that school is out.

Abby on the other hand.

Is very sad that school is out. She says that she wants to keep going to preschool. I am so glad that she went and was able to have that opportunity. She has truly benefited from it. She had an amazing teacher, Mrs. Burrell that really loves the children and puts her whole heart into the class and what she does with them. Thank you Mrs. Burrell for all that you have done this year!!

New School

Wow, I didn't realize it has been so long since I wrote. Now I am going to have to recall what the kids went through with changing schools.

D went into the Montessori program like it was made just for him. And I think it was. The kids loved him from the very beginning. Even a bully liked him from the beginning. The bully said, "we should call you stinky D." And D said, "pee u." The other kid just laughed!!

D's teacher said, "D has adjusted very well, in the beginning he had a hard time knowing what to do." She would find him sitting at the table confused. But once he learned that he can play learning games all day, WOW a whole new world opened up to him.

For kindergarten and part of first grade he had his photo taken and his shoulders were hunched over and his eye's didn't have the sparkle in them and his smile was forced. At this new school, they had picture day and wow it was like night and day. I don't think you could make his smile any wider and the sparkle in his eyes are in full force.

E on the other hand had a harder time adjusting. She would cry and say that she felt like she was in preschool. She wanted more structure and she even said that she wanted to go back to her old school to the sassy girls because she is used to them. She also wished that the classroom could be quieter. My heart went out to her. But I really wanted her to give this a try.

Now E is liking it more. She has found two friends that she really likes. She was really frustrated with multiplication because they learn it a little different. They use what is called a checker board to learn and for a week and a half she would come home so upset that they were confusing her and that she just didn't know what was the right way or the wrong way to do multiplication. Then one day I printed out a few sheets of multiplication problems for her to practice at home and as she started to work on them she said, "Mom, I don't need to do this on paper anymore. I know how to use the checker board and I am really good at it." We gave high fives and then she told me that she has two friends who helped her learn it. I asked about the two friends and she said that she really likes them and they remind her a lot of her best friend who lives around the corner.

I am so excited that E is really liking school and that D loves it. I have been wanting to find a school for my kids that caters to them, not the type of school where they have to find out how to fit in the mold. D's teacher is the head montessori teacher and I asked her a little about what to do with E and she said that if E wants to do a worksheet instead of checker board then she can. I am so grateful that they are excited to go to school each morning. E drags her feet sometimes but you can tell that she likes it.

Also real quick. D might have problems with dyslexia. I am so glad that he is in school and that he has an amazing teacher. A teacher that can tell me how he is doing and not just tell me that he is "a joy to have in class." So, we will be able to help him. We are going to wait until the next school year so he can be evaluated a little more and then he will be tested. His new teacher was shocked that other teachers haven't said anything about this. A's preschool teacher mentioned something to me, but it was kind of in passing about the way he held his scissors and that he wanted to learn how. She was really good to teach him. I think subconsciously I think all scissors went up when D was about two because once he was using a pair of scissors and he stabbed his hand, I almost had him get stitches but opted out.

What I Have Learned

I have learned so much these last two weeks. I withdrew my children from the charter school that they were in. We attempted Connections Academy, and it is not what I expected. Turns out that the support isn't as big as I thought it would be, unless of course I was on the phone with the teacher all day.

I don't feel like we gave the school much time to see if it would work for us, but ya know we tried and it just isn't right for us at this time. We were doing "school" for 7 to 8 hours a day and we were still behind on lessons.

So here is what I have learned,

• timing is everything. I guess I was so caught up in trying to do what is best for my two oldest children that I forgot that I still needed to give my time and attention to my three other children ages 5 and younger. So, maybe in the future I can try again. But, next time I will know better what to expect.
• I may feel like I want or need my children home, but they really do need some things that I just can't offer them at this time. And that is okay.
• During this transition of homeschooling to going back to school it has really made me reflect on what I want my family to be like. I would like to expand on this thought.

At times, I feel like Heavenly Father is prompting me to do something so I go forward and do it. And then later it just doesn't feel right. This doesn't mean that my feeling was incorrect or that I was just imagining it up. I know what I felt. However I do feel that God is in full control. This thought from C.S. Lewis helps explain what I'm feeling:

Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what he is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on: you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised.
But presently he starts knocking the house that in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is he up to? The explanation is that he is building quite a different house from the one you thought of-throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards.
You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage: but he is building up a palace.

Maybe Heavenly Father knew just what I needed to get my head to think a little differently and one of the ways to get me to see a situation differently was to put me in a situation that will help me change, knock out a few walls, so new ones can be built.

From this situation I started to think, "What if I only had two more years with my family, how would I want them to remember me? How do I want to treat them? What do I want to teach them about how a family should be?"

I don't think I am where I want to be. I want to be the kind of mom that really listens to her kids. Not just nod my head and say uh huh. I want to say "yes" more than "no", and why not, if one can say yes then do it. I think my natural response is no.

I want to be the kind of mom that has the kind of relationship with my kids where we can talk about anything.

I want to have the kind of home that feels safe.

Before I was married, I was asked the question, "what kind of home do you want to have?" My response was, "I want to live in a home that is filled with respect and love." I think I am mostly there. I have to laugh, because growing up that was one of my trade marks. I had and still have a talent of making sure that if you are around me you will show respect. I will not allow disrespect.

It has been nice re-evaluating my life and my family situation.

I have also found that I am ready for the next stage in life. If I don't have any more children I am okay with that. I love babies but I feel at peace having 5 children.

So maybe in a few years I will think about homeschooling yet again, but until then I will enjoy my younger children while the others are at school.

Oh I should probably mention that I found a Montessori school. E and D have gone for two days now. E says it is strange and D loves it so far.

FEAR

Wow!! E has been accepted to Connections Academy. Assessment test is done for D. Paperwork is all faxed in tonight. That means... we will be a homeschooling family in one and a half to two weeks from now.

I have so many mixed emotions about it. I know I need to get my kids schooling at home. I know this. However, I am worried that I will not be strict enough with them to get the schooling done each day. At first I will probably be overly strict, then I might be too lax, then I hope I am able to find middle ground.

I have a really good feeling deep down that,

1. we will be a closer family
2. we will learn over time how to manage our time better

I feel like right now we struggle because we get up in the morning just in time to get the kids dressed, fed and out the door. Then the kids come home, we get what we need to get accomplished, we fight about homework (not every night, but all too often), we eat dinner, read scriptures, and jump into bed. (We are usually fight with the girls to stay in bed.) I feel like we try and we want to be good, but we fight with the kids too much because we are tired and stressed with what is going on around us.

I feel like homeschooling will still be stressful, but I feel like it will be a different type stress. One that we can take on better, over time.

A New Light

This past weekend I attended a barbecue and while there visited with a friend who has 5 children and her youngest is now in High School. She homeschooled for a while and then put them back in school. Through the years they were enrolled in public, charter and other types of schools. I thought she would be a good resource to bounce ideas off of.

She said something during our conversation that really got me thinking. I have been so stressed about curriculum and being able to figure out what to teach my children.

She said, "I am an idea person." This really made me think. It's great that she is an idea person, she can come up with lots of ideas and she loves it. I on the other hand love to copy, I may tweak it a bit, but I love to see what others do and just follow suit. And that is okay, because we are all so different and that is what makes the world a wonderful place. If we were all the same how boring would that be?

So, after she said these wonderful words, I got to thinking. Why do I want to homeschool my kids? Why did this idea start anyways? What is the purpose for taking them out of school?

My main purpose for keeping my kids home is that I want them close, I feel that they can do their best learning here at home where they feel safe, where they don't have to worry about other kids teasing, judging, being mean physically or emotionally. Now I know that this is part of growing up. And I am sure that they will get all of this at church, in the neighborhood or even with activities outside the home.

I have decided to either go with Connections Academy or K12. They are a public schools that come to your home virtually. They equip you with all of the supplies needed to teach classes at home on the computer. I know I was opposed to this before but, after thinking about who I am I feel this will be best for my kids. They will be home and will be taught and if I see they are struggling in something I will be able to bring it to the attention of the teachers and they will accommodate the child. At this point I feel this is the best option.

I will be making a decision between these two schools and after I will enroll D. If he does well, I will probably pull E out. E will be able to work more solo but I know that I will have to help D out more until he gets older. It feels good to have made this decision.

Discouragement

I am feeling discouraged, I am feeling like if I keep the kids home they will miss out on so much that I know I will not be able to provide.

But then I think of the attention they could get from me, attention that only I can give. For instance. D is having a really hard time with Math, spelling, reading. So, his teacher sent home a few worksheets for him to do at home that he wasn't able to finnish at school. I sat down with him and he tried to do the math problems with a number line, ya know where if you are adding then you count ahead and if you are subtracting then you count back. The poor kid just can't seem to understand it. He understands that you need to jump forward or backwards at the appropriate time, he just doesn't understand that you need to start counting on the next number. So, we have some cute bug clips that I pulled out for him to count. He did this and he didn't like it but it seemed that it started to click better in his brain.

You see he is a wiggly willy kind of guy and he needs to be able to touch and learn with that sense. When he is given a sheet of paper with 100 problems on it, it is so overwhelming that he just wants to cry and he did cry. So, I feel that as his Mom I would be able to see that it is just too much for him. Not that he shouldn't do 100 problems but he needs it broken up more. He can do a worksheet with maybe 10 or 15 problems and then maybe a game or activity that has him figure out math problems, and then he could even do math games on the computer. And in reality he could be doing more than 100 problems, but they are FUN!! And then once he gets the hang of math, then I could give him math sheets that have more math problems on them.

In all reality homeschooling sounds great, but I wonder if I will be able to keep up, I wonder if I will want to spend all the time needed to teach.

I need to pull myself out of this rut, I know I can do this. I feel that it is what my kids need, it just seems so overwhelming.

Wiggly Willy???

I am still reading the book, 100 Top Picks For Homeschool Curriculum, and the section I am on helps you figure out what kind of kids you have and what kind of parent you are.

She has 4 types:

1. Wiggly Willy
2. Perfect Paula
3. Competent Carl
4. Sociable Sue

It is so funny I came out to be very much a Wiggly Willy and partly a Perfect Paula. I thought for sure that I would be a Perfect Paula all the way.

Wiggly Willy is a kinesthetic learner. That makes sense that I learn better with my senses. But they go on to say that a wiggly willy needs to move around a lot and that they need to have checkpoints or lists to ensure that they stay on task. Hmmm, now that I write this it does make sense. I really do have a problem staying on task or finishing a project. I think that is one reason and a big reason why I am so afraid of homeschooling. I could see myself letting school go to the wayside.

However I had the thought the other day. 'Heavenly Father has so much faith in me that he knows I can do this.' I may not have that faith in myself but he does and at this point that is all that matters. I will just need lots of lists and checkpoints!!

I guess to make this right I feel like I need to put the numbers of how I scored.

• Wiggly Willy: 7/8
• Perfect Paula: 5/9
• Competent Carl: 1 1/2/10
• Sociable Sue: 3/8

I had Matt take the test and he was very well rounded.

• Wiggly Willy:4/8
• Perfect Paula: 6/9
• Competent Carl: 5/10
• Sociable Sue: 3/8

Then we read what the kids could be:

Our 8 year old E: Perfect Paula and I said a little Wiggly Willy

Our 6 year old D: Competent Carl and I said Wiggly Willy

Our 5 year old A: Sociable Sue and I also thought she has Wiggly Willy in her

Our 3 year old J: Because of his age he is going to be Wiggly Willy

So now I am on to reading about what is the best learning styles for these different personalities. This is such a long process and this has been a very busy week.